A Very Impractical Musical Gift Guide
Things you probably won't buy and a few you might!
Here are some impractical music related gifts that I would like to receive this Christmas, plus a few that you actually might find useful! I think this post is too long for your inbox, so make sure you click through.
A Piano
I have had the same piano since I was 8 years old and I love it, but for the last few years I’ve been on the look out for a German pre-war boudoir grand because my “piano guy” who is a sort of piano matchmaker says those are the best. Having a piano in the house is a bit like having lots of books in a house, it just makes it feel more friendly. If you have a child, the piano is the perfect starter instrument, all the notes are there! There are always decent-ish upright pianos on resale platforms or auctions, just try and get a piano tuner or even just a friend who plays to give it a look over before you buy.
Consider the Metronome
More cost effective and space friendly than a piano, may I interest you in a metronome? A friend sent me the below video of PJ Harvey performing The Devil where she uses a metronome as a percussive instrument, which is kind of brilliant.
I grew up with one of these ticking away while I practiced and I’m looking for an nice old fashioned one to keep me in time once more. Something like this or this. For a small fortune, there is also this absolutely crazy Man Ray one with a photograph of the eye of his former lover, the American photographer and model, Lee Miller’s eye attached with a paperclip to it.
A CD Player
I have been considering buying a CD player for a little while and so I am taking this recommendation from
very seriously. He says: “ Retrieve your CD binder from your parents’ house, stop by all manner of used record stores, and more importantly, check Bandcamp or your fave band’s site for new CDs. This is a beautiful unit that belongs in your home.” He also highly recommends you peruse the Ghostly International catalogue for more excellent gift ideas.Musical Clothing
While I don’t think many people have put “dress that makes me look like a piano” on their wish list this year, why not surprise me them. Perhaps a musical scarf for someone you adore’s musical neck? Musical Céline Trainers? If you wear all three of these items together you will look insane.
A Thoughtful Selection of Albums
Records and CD’s are great gifts, but even better if they reveal something about the giver. I like the idea of putting together a thoughtful collection of albums around a theme: it could be albums you loved as a teenager, albums from the place you grew up in (as a friend of mine plans on giving her husband this year), or albums that make you think of the person you are giving them to. Tender and thoughtful!
A Song by a Charismatic, Ageing French Rock Star
This ad has been in the London Review of Books personal section forever. Take this charismatic, ageing French rock star up on his offer! As a blurb on his website says, “Who the hell is Imre Lodbrog? “He’s like Serge Gainsbourg on ‘shrooms...” I think there was a great article a few years ago by someone who commissioned a song, but I can’t find it. If you remember it please send it to me. . .
An Internet Radio
An amazing gift for anyone, plus a great way to discover new music, the radio! These Roberts internet radio’s are the best.
Classical Concert Tickets
Going to listen to classical music is like being in touch with a different time and in my opinion this is one of the best gifts in the world. I am dying to go to an opera at the Santa Fe Opera. La Scala are doing The Ring Cycle in March and I’d go and watch Barbara Hannigan anywhere. There are a number of iconic performers who are now well into their 80’s that I would love to see, and at the top of that list is Martha Argerich. You could also go and watch the most handsome conductor in the world conduct Mahler at The Concertgebouw. Even more amazing if your tickets come with a concert friendly piece of attire, like an excellent opera cape and gloves from here. Maybe a velvet cape and opera bag!
Sheet Music and Scores
I find few objects to contain more beauty and promise than Henle scores. Not sure which ones to buy, go for Bach’s French or English Suites or one (or all!) of the volumes of Beethoven and Mozart’s piano sonatas. (there’s clearly a real bias towards piano players in this gift guide)
Band T-Shirts and Merch
Either support an artist you love by buying their merch or go vintage, but do not buy those mass produced Urban Outfitters ones. I want the Rosalía t-shirt very badly, but it’s sold out. A Caroline Polachek thong is incredibly funny and I really like the charismatic leader energy of the Geese Holy Figure T-Shirt.
did a great write up on vintage band t-shirts here a little while ago, with links to some excellent options. Personally I am looking for a vintage Stone Roses t-shirt (size L) that does not cost $900. . .A Famous Musical Garment
A dress worn by Sabrina Carpenter and Ann-Margaret! A nude-illusion iridescent halter-neck for a choreographed disco performance worn by Cher! An illuminating, fully embellished evening gown worn by Tina Tuner! If you want to spend a lot of money on a famous dress, the Bob Mackie, Stage Glamour & The Couture Edit Auction is for you.
A Renaissance-era Notation Knife
Probably the most ridiculous gift in this guide, these 16th century notation knives with sheet music on them show a blessing on one side of the blade, which was possibly sung before the meal, and a grace on the reverse, which was probably sung after the meal! The closest you’ll get to buying one of these is a replication from a site called “ My Armoury.com” or you could also buy some beautiful cutlery and have part of a piece of music you know someone really likes engraved onto it, but I cannot work out if this is very tacky or incredible. I think it depends on what the song is!
Musical Notebooks
To commemorate one hundred years of Puccini’s life and work, Scriptum collaborated with Florentine stationers, Rossi, to create four notebooks of four of Puccini’s operas. Each notebook features a different opera and a popular aria from it on the back, made to resemble an original libretto cover from Puccini’s era. I would love to have all of these.
Perfect Musical Pairings
I like the idea of pairing gifts that enrich each other and
has a perfect trio to give someone this festive season. She says: “In Art as Experience, John Dewy writes that “Art is the extension of the power of rites and ceremonies to unite men, through a shared celebration, to all incidents and scenes of life. This office is the reward and seal of art. That art weds man and nature is a familiar fact. Art also renders men aware of their union with one another in origin and destiny.” Now, let’s take that and apply it by listening to this Sade album and drinking wine from these chic wine glasses. That is my destiny. Perhaps it’s yours, too.”An Iconic Pencil!
For perfect notation and marking up of scores, these are very romantic pencils adored by the likes of Stephen Sondheim, Quincy Jones and Leonard Bernstein.
This is the best gift guide I’ve seen, I will be requesting the Puccini stationery for my Christmas present.
brb ordering a song from the ageing French rock star for my cat